took some more film photos

I am writing this in a bit of a daze so forgive me. Or don’t. I quite like writing when fatigue makes me feel uninhibited, for the same reason I play games better in this state. Quicker to get into a flow state, which I think is my body spiting the pain. Anyway, here I am. I took more photos on the film camera my Nan gave me. The first roll was black and white, and the second was colour. I asked our Instagram acolytes where’s best to develop this stuff, because the local place by me is £££scary. The most recommended by far was Take It Easy lab in Leeds. I was… hesitant. Just because even though it was slightly cheaper, it meant posting the film roll rather than walking it to the other store near me. And what if it got lost in the post! Ngl, in my 29 years, not one thing I’ve sent has gotten lost in the post. Everything always turns up. But I have become so sentimental about film photos, and time, and one-off-ness, and memories, and the rare opportunities my energy allows me to actually see friends IRL. So, what if the film gets lost in the post!!! Didn’t happen. Instead, my boyfriend posted the film for me, and the very next day I got an email from Take It Easy Lab linking me to a dropbox with all the scans. The next day! The other place (Max Spielmann fyi) took 2 weeks, no scans. I was thrilled. But I also… wasn’t. So many of my pictures were blurry 8-( T_T Not because of the speedy Leeds lab, but because I am still learning how to use this camera and arfgrgrrhrh. Anyway, here are my favourite in-focus pictures and even some of the blurry ones because I like to imagine what they would have liked if they’d worked :)

Look at my beautiful friends

Went to Renshaw St Market with ZM, my best most cleverest pal Priya, and Vishal Kumaraswamy who was visiting Liverpool :D look at way the colours in the neon lights turned all milky, toned down, lovely!

look it’s me:

look it’s a white pube specsavers advert:

god bless us:

forgot to tell everyone to stand still while looking at some art in the biennial:

Told Zarina to do a big vape smoke:

Zarina was up because she was doing an event at Dead Ink Bookshop where she was interviewing Polly Barton about her book Porn:

I was the designated photographer but whoever gave me that task is dumb because I can’t reliably use my camera hahaha

okay shift gears, it’s Coco time:

shift gears again: John Moores painting prize judging days, focus INTERMITTENT:

this was the view from the hotel (I do like living in liverpool very nice very nice):

Finally, two pictures that would have been great if I could get my shit together:

I’m kinda struggling a lot with my health at the moment so it is nice to reflect on these beautiful beautiful film photos. Like, even if it costs more than taking 100,000 iphone pictures – if it’s risky not being able to see the result for a while, and a faff to have to send them away to get developed – they feel like real memories in a way that camera roll debris simply does not. And that helps tbh. Because it makes me think, yes, nice things have happened in my life, and nice things will happen again. The only thing is, I wish I thought to take film photos of my bed life. My bedtivities. Knitting in slow-motion when I can’t really think. Up at 6AM because it’s the only time I can. I should dedicate a film roll to fatigue. It is an ugly state that I do not think is worth remembering (and one I’m not even sure will translate properly to camera) but then… I look at this handful of photos of me outside and it feels like something that happened in another life. I gotta get film photos of me looking like a zombie to balance the scales tbh. Coming soon.